So here was the plan. Feeling inspired, refreshed, and motivated to come back from India and hit the ground running I thought to myself, "there are so many things in New York that I have not experienced, done, etc." So, I would spend my time here living like I meant it. I don't know how long I will be living in this city and I really want to feel like I squeezed everything I could out of it.
But now that I am here, I've realized (or was rudely reminded) how much the money in your pocket influences what you are able to do in a day. New York is so expensive and I refuse to get a job that sustains me at a higher income level. So what can I do?
I've come back as the new me and have had to live the life of the old me. It is sometimes comfortable to walk the paths old me has already paved, but more and more I feel like I look like someones long lost daughter and they are making me wear all her clothes.
I didn't know it would be like this.
I had health issues, nothing major, but to determine the causes, I avoided stressful situations, jobs, and work loads, I slowly reduced my diet to vegan and macrobiotic, I developed a regular schedule that kept everything sattvic.
And now its tamasic.
I want to delete everything around me because I can't point out what is driving me crazy. Is it the weather? New York? My job? My schedule? My apartment? My belongings? My diet? My thoughts? The way I look? My family? My friends? My significant other? My finances? My practice? Is it me?
But now that I am here, I've realized (or was rudely reminded) how much the money in your pocket influences what you are able to do in a day. New York is so expensive and I refuse to get a job that sustains me at a higher income level. So what can I do?
I've come back as the new me and have had to live the life of the old me. It is sometimes comfortable to walk the paths old me has already paved, but more and more I feel like I look like someones long lost daughter and they are making me wear all her clothes.
I didn't know it would be like this.
I had health issues, nothing major, but to determine the causes, I avoided stressful situations, jobs, and work loads, I slowly reduced my diet to vegan and macrobiotic, I developed a regular schedule that kept everything sattvic.
And now its tamasic.
I want to delete everything around me because I can't point out what is driving me crazy. Is it the weather? New York? My job? My schedule? My apartment? My belongings? My diet? My thoughts? The way I look? My family? My friends? My significant other? My finances? My practice? Is it me?
I woke up this morning and the first thing I thought was not "let's practice", but "I want breakfast". So I ate. And now I'm debating whether to go to a class, practice at home or call today a rest day because I intend to go to a friend's class tomorrow.
99%practice 1% theory
You're getting snow soon! The weather sounds great! And you can go out to the beach and walk against the wind under the sun, it's beautiful out by the Rockaways on a sunny day in winter. And you can eat pizza at Totonno's in Coney Island, it's cheap! Just pretend it's a local dosa and fear not about food poisoning. You can go into the Met and the Brooklyn Museum for free if you're really skint. There are a few things worth seeing in there.
ReplyDeleteAnd after all of that fun, just imagine how poor and miserable Mysore must be for the average farmer's son arriving from Kerala as a student. According to my workmates from Bangalore and Chennai, New York and London are cheap for us compared to what the average to lower income Indian has to live through when they go to the big city.
Now I'll try to apply that to my living in London... and will try to get back to my own practise. Bon courage !
-cij
PS-Get the white pie, forget about toppings.
ReplyDeleteHi Elise
ReplyDeleteBeautiful video. Meditation is doing something for the world, because you do no harm to anyone when doing it.
hugs
Arturo