A week in review: Poop, Poses, Sharath, Gommateshwara, Wild beasts, and Ayurvedic Massages

Daily posts are better. A lot happens in a day and now I have to mush them all together. I am scrambling to catch up. But I'll try. This sounds like a long post but actually I get distracted and it starts to taper off at the end.

Poop:

There is that scary moment when you are about to crap your pants for real. You feel this curling cold sensation up the back of your neck. It's panic because you know that you could easily loose control of your bodily functions and be stuck cleaning shit out of your pant leg in about an hour's time. Your mind realizes that actually many of your bodily functions happen on their own and if you begin to doubt your ability to control them at this point, you're going to be in serious trouble.

I was farting these real stinky ones at a friend's house. He gave me a very large dose of wormwood extract and grapefruit seed extract because the farts smelled a lot like eggs which could mean giardia and the extracts will kill anything. I drank it down and started the walk home. What I didn't know was that this concoction was like the five point palm-exploding heart technique, five steps out the door and two farts later, I had a fart that was not going to be a fart at all. Gross but true. What's an India story without some dilemma of the bowels?

Okay so I knew I really had to go right away. So I walked faster and then the mind started going and questioning and I started running. I contemplated squatting in the bushes but the possibility of an unexpected meeting with a cobra kept me running. My bowels knew I was close to my house before anything else and a good punch in the belly had me sweating and running faster but running is tricky when you're about to crap your pants so it was more of a quick waddle...Let's end it there. I didn't crap my pants. The end.

Poses:
Yesterday I got parsva dhanurasana, ustrasana, and laghu vajrasana. Today I got a stamp of approval and also got kapotasana.

Sharath:
More on this later. But--apparently we're supposed to read. Imagine! Also we're supposed to be thinking more about the yamas and niyamas. But what are those? Hmm.

Gommateshwara:
Is this big ole statue that we drove a long way to see. We had to walk up the stairs--barefoot--to see it. Fun.

Wild beasts:
The zoo is cool. People are crazy.

Ayurvedic Massage:
Is nice.

So I think it is obvious that I need to be in a quiet space to write. Thanks for helping to shape this post John.