You are what you eat

So maybe I take things just a little too seriously sometimes.

Food. It all comes down to food. What you put in your body. And although I think I live a healthy lifestyle, I admit that I've been relatively reckless since Wednesday. The result, feeling like crap (but not being able to) before practice. But today I got up early with plenty of time to sit in pasasana, do nauli kriya, kundalini stimulation exercises, breathe through my left nostril, drink a cup of hot water, and sit and simply try. All to no avail. I was really pissed off when I finally rolled out my mat. I think I was mad because I felt out of control. It wasn't really the fact that I was born without a "poop now" button, so much as I suppose I wasn't being mindful yesterday or the day before. My mind turned to mush and so did my inner chef.

The one thing that this all keeps boiling down to is what are you eating? Why are you eating like a maniac? Why are you sleep walking to the kitchen and force feeding yourself? WHY!?

I don't know! And I kind of do.

Anyway, back to practice...I was really pissed off and kind of lethargic feeling. Then Christina, Guy's Sunday assistant (bless her heart), tried to assist me in pasasana and I don't know why but I just wasn't having any of it. It was probably a lot like changing the diaper of an extremely unruly toddler. I just felt like my practice was poop and didn't want anyone to touch me and tell me its alright or help me or whatever. I was being really mean. "Oh you can't do this and you can't do that because you can't even take a shit before practice." But turns out I could. I was doing all the things that bring up drama even on a good day with less effort. I even crossed and lowered in karandavasana (for one second) all by myself. Even grabbed ankles in back bending when I thought I couldn't suck more.

Funny.

Funny how thinking all about my anus probably helped keep my awareness there and made the practice very grounded and centered. I mean, I REALLY knew where my pelvis was because I was telling it what a good for nothing...it was.

Okay. Laughing time now.

Saw "Point Break" last night. Amazing. "Young, dumb, and full of cum."